[ It will become more obvious in the moments after he speaks that the patterns were not intentional. And neither was the outburst. Panic, fear, flickers through his eyes before he clamps down on it, reestablishes the mask, shuts it all down. ]
[He doesn't ask 'what was', at least not so bluntly, because that's been implied well enough. Four hundred years. Okay, right, he's got it.
He has no idea what to do with it just yet, but he's got it.
Alexei takes a breath. His thumbnail worries at the shallow grooves of the engraving in the cool metal against his palm.]
I'm not gonna pretend I know what four hundred years is like. [He took that much easily enough, it seems. Not human? Sure. No problem.] But I know what being a prisoner is like. And not here.
[A pause. He settles himself with a breath, counting in his head.]
Guess it depends what you'd do if you had the chance to try again, make things better.
[Not having to just accept everything you're given because you think you don't deserve differently is something that takes a while to sink in. He knows that well enough.]
[ It's a nice thought, it is... but it's a step too far for him right now. It requires seeing too far into the future, allowing for too much hope and possibility. Too much change.
The firm, definitive 'no', though... that is some progress. ]
[ Jinu breathes in deep, tips his head back to breath out super slow, and rolls his eyes all the way before dropping his head back and dropping it back down, punctuating the whole gesture by transforming on the final bob into his full demon form.
Surprise, motherfucker. ]
What part of 'I get that you have to read my file' did you somehow not get, dude?
[ The tone says, rather tiredly, 'do you have any idea the kind of shit I could have gotten up to while you were respecting my autonomy, dumbass'? ]
[And... again, it doesn't seem to bother him at all. He looks Jinu over quite deliberately, taking it all in, and he... shoots a guess.]
So... demon?
[Oh, he's well aware that the Admiral nerfs most abilities on the way in. Anything else Jinu could have got up to... would reading his file have really made a difference, when he still didn't have a mind to place punitive restrictions on him 'just in case'?
That all comes down to personality and opportunity, and anyone can do terrible things.]
[ He doesn't need powers to cause trouble, Alexei. He has four hundred years of knowing exactly how to play people, exactly how to tweak them and use them and direct them. If he hadn't wanted to do what he's 'supposed to', there could be a dozen or so emotional bombs ready to go off.
[Alexei barks out a sudden laugh. He's still chuckling a little as he pulls a cigarette from the pack in his pocket and lights it.]
I know.
[But god did he ever need it.]
Didn't figure I'd live long enough to care when I picked it up. [He tilts his head, looking at the lit cigarette. Shrugs.] I've cut down. But, y'know. Habits.
I am completely innocent. Don't know what you're talking about.
[Since he has a better idea of where Jinu is coming from now, and that the guy actually wants to try and joke around with him, he takes it in entirely good humour.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Nothing. All I want is nothing.
An end.
[ Another flicker of something real. ]
It... was supposed to finally be over.
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He has no idea what to do with it just yet, but he's got it.
Alexei takes a breath. His thumbnail worries at the shallow grooves of the engraving in the cool metal against his palm.]
I'm not gonna pretend I know what four hundred years is like. [He took that much easily enough, it seems. Not human? Sure. No problem.] But I know what being a prisoner is like. And not here.
[It's an attempt at some kind of empathy, there.]
... If you had another chance, would you take it?
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What good would that do anyone?
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Guess it depends what you'd do if you had the chance to try again, make things better.
[Not having to just accept everything you're given because you think you don't deserve differently is something that takes a while to sink in. He knows that well enough.]
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You mean like a breach. As a different person. A new person. Is that what you mean?
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How much do you know about the deals the Admiral gives out?
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[ It's a nice thought, it is... but it's a step too far for him right now. It requires seeing too far into the future, allowing for too much hope and possibility. Too much change.
The firm, definitive 'no', though... that is some progress. ]
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Okay.
[It's a lot. Sure. He'll just circle back to a more immediate question, then.]
Been trying to think of a polite way to put this, but I don't think I'm gonna find one. [He gestures at Jinu.]
... What was that.
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Surprise, motherfucker. ]
What part of 'I get that you have to read my file' did you somehow not get, dude?
[ The tone says, rather tiredly, 'do you have any idea the kind of shit I could have gotten up to while you were respecting my autonomy, dumbass'? ]
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So... demon?
[Oh, he's well aware that the Admiral nerfs most abilities on the way in. Anything else Jinu could have got up to... would reading his file have really made a difference, when he still didn't have a mind to place punitive restrictions on him 'just in case'?
That all comes down to personality and opportunity, and anyone can do terrible things.]
Explains the teleporting. And a few other things.
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All the same-]
Yup.
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[Nod, nod.
Is he taking that news a bit too well? It's hardly strange to him. Very little is by now.]
Cool. [Another look. He's not staring. If anything he just seems mildly interested.] And this is... a secret.
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One person knows. And you now. Annnnd it looks like that's it, since the deck's pretty empty.
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Mmmn. Guess so. Then I'll keep it to myself.
[Since he figures there is a reason Jinu isn't making it public.]
You mind if I smoke?
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Those things'll kill you, you know.
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I know.
[But god did he ever need it.]
Didn't figure I'd live long enough to care when I picked it up. [He tilts his head, looking at the lit cigarette. Shrugs.] I've cut down. But, y'know. Habits.
[He'll quit, eventually. Probably.]
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[ This, however, has no bite to it. He's smiling, just a little, as he shakes his head. ]
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I am completely innocent. Don't know what you're talking about.
[Since he has a better idea of where Jinu is coming from now, and that the guy actually wants to try and joke around with him, he takes it in entirely good humour.
Hand on heart.]
Such terrible accusations.
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[ Pure shit-eating bullshit here. ]
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That's us. Both just so entirely innocent. Pure as the driven snow.
[Absolute bullshit.]
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'Driven'? Isn't that the grey stuff on the side of the road?
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You know, it sounds that way, but 'driven snow''s the really soft, white stuff that gets picked up and pushed into drifts by the wind.
[A beat.]
There's a lot of snow where I'm from.